My Gay Best Friend - July

My Gay Best Friend

--- K.P. Lennox

Everything hurts. Every. Single. Part. Of. My. Body. I mean really, try being drug behind a boat for four hours and tell me that you’re not going to be sore. It’s like an aquatic gay bashing, except I kept asking for more.

We’re going to take a little tangent here to give a shout out to all those lovely people in New York. HOLLA! Well done, kudos, shalom, wakka wakka wakka, so on and so forth…

For those wonderful, church-going, nuclear family unit and “traditional marriage” supporting dissenters I have the following two words: suck it.

It was pretty difficult trying to figure out what to even write. And of course, yet again we’re a bit late on the issue. Thankfully, something happened!

This GBF won’t be devoted to my vapid ramblings or the problems belonging to you, the reader.

There was an awkward little incident last week at work. I was, in essence, called out on my sexuality. It was neither critical nor malicious, nothing more than matter of fact. The worst part was how red I turned and how sweaty my palms got.

I work alongside three computer geeks, two web designers, and one other engineer—all of which are heterosexual males. The volley of insults like faggot, cocksucker, queer, and homo pepper casual conversation. Most of the time I just sit idly. Hell, at times I even toss in some of my own lexical concoctions. 

But once it, that fateful event of being thrust from the janitorial broom-closet, happened the reaction was surprising. No furrowed brows, no broken glasses, and thankfully no brandishing of blunt weapons. The most exciting part was when our resident computer engineer, who is my age, grabbed my X-ACTO knife to carve out a particularly nasty hangnail. He didn’t even flinch when I dropped the G-word.

Per usual there was a follow-up of “Personal Questions.” It’s one of the perks of working with a Mormon—he’s actually one of the more liberal people with whom I work.

I will admit that I had developed an intense shell of prejudice toward these strange male creatures I had to associate with everyday. Nonetheless it served as an enlightening reminder that even those we associate with violent opposition towards homosexuality (i.e. straight men) can surprise us with massive amounts of compassion and understanding.

And the best part? It framed my comment 20 minutes later about the fabulous needlework on Kate Middleton’s wedding dress quite nicely.

G